Testimony #12: Attonement

Hello,
So I'm hitting a bit of a lag in this. If you havn't noticed I've been slacking and been posting quite early.
This makes for short and half-butted testimonies. I need to make time for this. I came home from church today and turned on my laptop in plans of coming straight here, posting, maybe getting on facebook and being done. Instead I watched you tube for a long time, and now it's 2 in the morning. just so ya know, I have 1 o'clock church, and I got home maybe around 5, and I didn't spend all night in my room, because like I ate and stuff and some other stuff that took me off my computer, so yea, It was excessive, but not as bad as it sounds.
wow, I just did more excusing than I did testifying for the last 3 nights, that's pretty lame of me...
but anyway.... Hmm what do I have a testimony about....everything. Hymns, I know that hymns are a great sorce of inpiration and can really bring the spirit into your life. Whenever I get afraid or uncomfortable I always sing "I know that my Redeemer lives." one of my favorite hymns is "come thou fount of many blessings" in the chorus is probably my favorite verbage: prone to wander Lord I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love. Here's my heart oh take and seal it. Seal it for thy courts above.
I love it :) I love it because I can really feel that in my life, It is a constant fight to stand up for what you believe in, to do what is right. I am NOT perfect, I wander, I sin. And I do love my Heavenly Father very much... So in that song when it says "here's my hear, oh take and seal it" I do want to turn my heart to my Lord. Guess I didn't tonight and made youtube a priority....I guess I have some repenting to do.
It's a good thing that I have a testimony of repentance and the attonment. I know that we can obtain forgivness through repentance. We can come unto Christ again. We can be forgiven, we can forsake the sins that once confounded us. I want to share this experience...
It came time for me to repent. It was for something that I have struggled with for a long time, and I was upset I let myself fall into the destructive pattern once again.  I came home on my lunch break from work and I started praying.  I didn't want to pray, something was trying to hold me back; satan, shame, I don't know but it was dificult to get the words to come out.
Once I did manage to talk to my Heavenly Father I started crying, weeping, wailing. I was beside myself. It was no bueno. As I was praying I thought of "Oh the wailing and nashing of teeth" and I knew that I was feeling that feeling. I was truley feeling Godly sorrow.  after several minutes of pleading and appologizing, I ended my prayer and opened my eyes to find that my nose had been bleeding and I bled over my hands. And as I was praying I had been touching my face a bunch, I looked like a hot mess! it was on my bed too. So, I had to clean myself up.
I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror, (hot mess) and as I looked at the blood on my hands and face I thought of the Saviors blood that attoned for my sins. I realized His love for me and I knew that I would be able to be forgiven.
I started to wash myself off with a white rag, and as I was washing I thought "Though your sins be as scarlet, they will be white as snow" and I knew that I could be clean again. And in that monent I again, began to feel God's love for me even more. I felt my Saviors love. I knew that I still had a chance to return to live with him again. And I knew I never wanted to forget that feeling.
I still know, my internet brothers and sisters, that my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ died for me. He suffered for my sins. I know that no matter how far we think we've gone, no matter what mistakes we've made, how many times we've made them, OUR FATHER STILL LOVES US!! He still wants us to feel peace and KNOW that He loves us. That we are His children.  I know that we can be forgiven, we can get back on the right track, we can better ourselves and He will never turn His back from us. We will ALWAYS be welcomed back with open arm.
I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen

ps. baring your testimony is AWESOME!!!